ROBERT FICTIONAL LISTMASTER
CREATOR OF LISTS
SKILLED AND KNOWLEDGEABLE DESIGNER OF LISTS. HAS DISTINCTIVE STYLE: TYPES EVERYTHING IN UPPERCASE. THIS DOES NOT HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH LISTS, BUT YOU SHOULD KNOW IT ANYWAY.
REASONS YOU SHOULD HIRE ROBERT FICTIONAL LISTMASTER
- ROBERT FICTIONAL LISTMASTER IS A SKILLED AND KNOWLEDGEABLE DESIGNER OF LISTS
- ROBERT FICTIONAL LISTMASTER IS THE BEST CREATOR OF LISTS TO EVER EXIST
- SERIOUSLY, LOOK AT THIS LIST!
- I MEAN, COME ON! HOW CAN YOU LOOK AT THAT AND NOT HIRE HIM?
- AND HE HAS A REALLY COOL NAME!
- LISTMASTER! MAN, DON'T YOU WISH YOUR NAME WAS THAT COOL?
- ROBERT FICTIONAL LISTMASTER DOES NOT EAT OR BATHE. HE FOCUSES ON LISTS.
- THESE LISTS WILL GET YOUR COMPANY IN THE FORTUNE 500.
- AS NUMBER ONE.
AN EXCERPT FROM THE FORTUNE 500
- WHICHEVER ONE HAS ROBERT FICTIONAL LISTMASTER
- WAL-MART
- EXXON MOBIL
EDUCATION AND EXPERIENCE
- ROBERT FICTIONAL LISTMASTER HAS A PH. D. IN LISTS FROM HARVARD UNIVERSITY
- HE ALSO HAS ONE FROM STANFORD AND ONE FROM A TOP SECRET GENIUS SCHOOL.
- ROBERT FICTIONAL LISTMASTER HAS MORE EXPERIENCE WITH LISTS THAN ANYONE ELSE.
- ROBERT FICTIONAL LISTMASTER INVENTED LISTS.